Plethora of Stupid Things
I think I may have too many balls in the air, because I keep doing seriously moronic, stupid things. Case in point of my dunderheaded-ness is what happened today. I have been trying to box up my house to move. I have fifteen bags filled with outcast crap on my porch waiting for Goodwill pick-up that I keep obsessively adding to. I’m in full-throttle de-crap mode. If I haven’t touched it in years, it is banished to Goodwill. Devlin is in summer school in the mornings and is hardly gone long enough to justify the time it takes to transport him. The girls have friends over. Rowan is packing for camp next week. They are all packing to visit family over the holiday this week. Cleaning out the bathroom closet necessitates replacing all the toothbrushes and stopping to clean the sink that has been mauled by toothpaste. I can’t seem to finish any project I start and am only adept at starting new ones. My To-Do list has reached epic proportions and spans four pages. In the midst of my mania, a realtor called and wanted to show my house. I tidy up the place and chastise the girls because the enormous blanket fort they built in the living room isn’t going to show well to prospective tenants. Fuckers.
Then I suddenly remember I have to take my oldest to the dentist to have her tooth pulled. With no time to spare, I send my kids, plus one, to my car so I can take them all to the dentist because doesn’t that sound fun. I strive to take bored children to sit in as many waiting rooms as I can over the unending summer. I hate to squander a great, when-dear-God-are-they-going-back-to-school, child activity. It is only at that very moment I remember that we dropped off my car at the shop the night before and I have no transportation. I mean, unless you count skateboards. Scrambling, I jog over to my neighbor’s house and greet her as she’s unloading groceries from her car in the driveway. I explain my predicament and how I should get ADHD testing. She graciously loans me her car. I zoom to the dentist and miraculously get there on time. I retell this story of how stupid I am to the receptionist and she looks quizzically at me. “I don’t know how to tell you this, but you don’t have an appointment this week. We have you down for next week.” I briefly wonder which Dumb Way To Die is going to mark my demise. Being dumb blows.
My dentist rocks and they squeezed Rowan in so I could save some minor face by at least being able to mark “Tooth pulled” off my insane to-do list. This is the only thing I got done today. Really. The only thing.