fake book reviews

Fake Book Reviews

I always heard positive reviews are hard to get when you’ve written a book.
 Am I the only one who figured out you can just write them yourself?

Fake Book Reviews

What People Are Saying About Jen’s Book:

The grammar and spelling in the book were excellent! I didn’t understand
 why the author wanted to write about all those personal things, though.
 Couldn’t she have just put things on Facebooks? I don’t know why she
 had to curse so much or talk about topics like masturbation. Nobody wants to read ladies talk like that. She could have written a cookbook or a clevermurder mystery I could share with my book club. That would have been nice. At least she was married to a lawyer. It was interesting to get insidethe author’s head to see how she thinks, but holy smokes! I always thought 
I wanted to know what she really thought, but I think I’m good now.


– Jennifer’s Mother

Although I haven’t read the book yet, that doesn’t mean I can’t have strong
 opinions about it. I will for sure get around to reading it. I do have other books that sound a lot more interesting than Jen’s book,
 and I’m not really a fan of memoirs. Jen is my friend, though, and it would
 probably be rude not to read her book eventually. And Jen is usually pretty
 funny. What if it’s terrible, though? I don’t want to waste my time on her
 book if it’s terrible. Think of the hours I could never
 recapture. Can someone read it and let me know if it sucks?

-Jennifer’s Friend from law school

I have read my book several times now and it is amazing. Like cheese. It just
 gets better and better with age until it starts molding and stinking up the
 refrigerator. Definitely read the book before it gets to the moldy stage.

– Jennifer

This book was completely stupid and well-written. There were no unicorns,
 no dragons, no mystical creatures at all. I wanted to read about dueling midgets, and there wasn’t a single little person in the entire book. Very few
 fight scenes. Nere a mention of vampires or chickens. And apparently Ms.McCoy doesn’t like “clowns” because there weren’t any clowns introduced
 into the narrative either. A total waste of time and money unless you actually
 want to read one of those reflective, funny, “life-affirming” readable books that you can’t believe the events all happened to one person.


-A Fantasy Novel Fan Jennifer picked up on Twitter

An incredible debut novel by a remarkable, thin, smartly-dressed author.
 Pathos meets punch line. If you don’t want to sleep with Jennifer after
 reading this book then there is something wrong with you.

– Jennifer’s Best Friend

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4 Comments

  1. Tony

    How about

    Well all in all not a bad book. Could have used a little more bestiality, but thats not for everyone. Reading the prison sex scenes took me back to better days. Her attention to the fine details of two hairy fat men having sex in a prison cell is amazing. Who would have thought that hot, sweaty man-love could be beautiful.

    Jethro from Cell Block D

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