Senior Photos: Let This Be a Lesson For You, Children

Senior Photos

I counted myself among the herd of Pink Cows again to get an ultrasound and a few mammograms at the Hospital. The technicians had me contort into unnatural positions like with my hand on my hip or above my head while turning my head just so or posing with my chin down or off to the side. And of course my boob was smashed between the teeth of an enormous plastic standing panini maker during the entire photo shoot. (Doctor friend Daniel gets credit for coming up with the panini maker reference.) It reminded me of some Awkward risque photo shoot to have my Senior High School photo taken.

Senior photos
Awkward Senior Photos
What kind of background is appropriate for the exposed boob hospital photo shoot? Should I opt for the star laser background? One that incorporates my favorite electric guitar and burns people’s eyes if I also wear a striped sweater to compliment the laser beams?
Senior photos
Awkward Senior photos
This is sort of how I felt in the boob panini maker. Only I was wearing a pink hospital gown with my parts hanging out. So similar. Access Awkward Gallery here
senior photos
Awkward Senior photos
But I really want to show off ALL my hobbies. My love for football and firewood piles, for instance. And who doesn’t want their hairy legs in their senior photo? Not me, I say! Nike will be knocking on your door for endorsement opportunities. And that senior sneer! You’ve nailed it, my friend! More Ridiculous Sr. Photos
Senior Photos
Awkward Senior photos
I didn’t realize they actually TOOK risque Chippendales senior photos. Wrong. Again. Is that smoke coming off his body or is it wafting in through the pink levelor blinds? I’m swooning over the mullet. The middle part in his hair totally updates the look. And this photo has boobs in it, so that just makes it that much more super awesome.
Senior photos
Awkward Senior photos
Why not add a little “show girl” to your gently fallen snow background in the Czech Republic senior photo? If you try, you can imagine she’s wearing a feathery bra. And is she stoned? Or should she be? More awesome photos here
Senior photos
Awkward Senior photos
See, this is the way to make your actual senior photo seem tame and appropriate. Sweet, even. Gawd, at least my hair isn’t permed. I rocked (the shit out of) my hot rollers for this photo.
Senior photos
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