New friend, Warrior Jeremy

The Warrior Dash, touted as the World’s Largest Running Series, though not the physically-demanding, non-stop, muddy thrill I thought it would be, was still a total blast. Leaping over fire, climbing ropes and walls, crawling through muddy ravines on your hands and knees, jogging through car tires, climbing over wrecked Toyotas and chevys. Folks were in high spirits, wearing all manner of super hero costumes, camo, body paint, faux beards, tutus, funky sunglasses, masks, tights, burlap, dresses, you name it. There were a few guys wearing business suits. I followed a turkey for most of the race. It never got old ribbing him (pun intended) that I couldn’t believe I was being bested by a freaking turkey. Afterwards, you get to drink beer and eat turkey legs. A fine way to spend a Saturday.

Sadly, we had no spectators to take photos of us after swimming 50 yards in two feet of mud under barbed wire (will have to wait for Race Photos), so these photos were taken after the firemen hosed us all down with fire hoses spraying breathtakingly cold water. Even so, we all had mud encrusted in our ears, our teeth, around lady parts and manly bits. ‘Tis not an event for the prissy.

Warriors Chris & Deana

Warrior Deana & Me

The Warriors McCoy

Happily, no injuries. Well, no injuries during the race. As it turns out, the most painful part of the race was my bruised, scraped-up knee that I injured two days prior to the race. As I have mentioned, my friend Wendi and I have been doing pilates in the morning. It’s a middle-aged woman thing. Just wait. It’ll happen to you, too. We only live a few houses down from each other so I’ve been walking over before the sun comes up on account of our thighs and our buns. As it turns out, they need sculpting. At this point, I just show up on her porch in my pajamas. All the moves are on the floor, so stop judging me. Thursday morning I sleepwalked to her house in the rain and managed to fall up the two clearly-visible, vicious cement stairs to her house because my pajama bottoms were too long, my slippers were too big, morning is not my forte and my proclivity to injure myself is off the charts high. Proof you don’t need Warrior Dash obstacles to challenge yourself. You just need ordinary neighbor steps. Now when people ask me how The Warrior Dash was, I get to say “It was great except for that Pajama Accident that ripped off the skin of my knee. Gotta watch out for pajama injuries. They can be a bugger.”