Leaving your job: 10 lousy reasons
If you’ve ever contemplated leaving your job, make sure you know what the right reasons are.
10. Wanted to stay home so I could wash my tea cup daily. I prefer to use the dishwasher instead of accumulating those yucky stains that hand-washing at the office sink doesn’t touch.
9. Finally succumbed to guilt from stealing post-it notes and random pens from the office for use at home.
8. Stayed up too late and watched Jerry Maguire two times in a row while intoxicated and was inspired to write a career-ending Mission Statement.
7. Heard the economy is really picking up and felt like rolling the dice. I mean, how bad could it be?
6. Anxious to experience first-hand entitlements from the government but didn’t realize the government isn’t working this year. (Fuckers.)
It’s not leaving your job so much as consciously uncoupling from it
5. Misunderstood what “stacation” meant and demanded a permanent one, effective immediately.
4. As a stress starver, just couldn’t lose those last five pounds any other way.
3. Stress level not high enough for my comfort zone so decided to mix it up a little.
2. Come on, it’s not like I have a mortgage or expenses or people who depend on me for support.
- Exhausted permutations of favorite password and lacked inspiration to think of new ones I could ever fucking remember.